Suffering, I Know that I Am Suffering

4 9 22

Had to bring out the big guns today. Bought a book by mindfulness master, Thict Nhat Hanh; a technical book on Buddhism; ‘The Heart of the Buddha’s Teachings’. I listened to chapter seven; ‘Touching our Suffering’, and chapter nineteen; ‘The Three Doors of Liberation’.

I’d like to think Thay (Thict) is smiling down on me (he passed away last year) and proud of my diligence in strengthening my spiritual practice under circumstances of considerable adversity (severe illness).

I’d like to share my two favorite insights from each of the chapters. This post will be about chapter seven on touching suffering.

Thay tells us: “when we suffer, while not knowing we suffer”, is the deepest form of suffering.

One may be tempted to think we’re often aware when we are suffering, but this is likely not the case. When suffering appears, we may run from it, instead of confronting the fact that we are suffering. We may throw ourselves into a certain activity to escape our suffering, and this habit is easy to develop. But running from our suffering is a mistake, because suffering will be there waiting for us, after the distraction abates.

Thay quotes, the Buddha, who says; “Suffering, while not knowing we are suffering, is like a packed mule with a thousand-ton weight on its back, it’s unbearable suffering, and very harmful.”

It’s not that suffering is bad in itself, it’s that this way of suffering; suffering while not knowing that one suffers, is the form in which we suffer the most.

The first step in remedying our suffering, is to be brave, and sit with our suffering, acknowledge our suffering, welcome our suffering, and not run from our suffering. This is a difficult practice. That’s why we need Happiness and joy to be present with us, so we can, then, sit, and not run from our suffering.

We need to water joy and happiness within our mind, so we can sit with our suffering and acknowledge it. Meditation is crucial. We need an object to meditate on to allow us to clear and lighten the mind. Thay recommends walking and sitting meditation. Placing our awareness on our feet, body, breathing, vision. I, also, recommend looking and listening meditation, if sitting and walking meditation are not possible, which is often the case when one is ill.

A person can look at nature, listen to music, and lighten one’s spirits in a variety of non-destructive ways; and then let the suffering come in; come in suffering.

Suffering in the here and now, I am aware that I am suffering, aware that I am suffering, compassion rises up in my consciousness.

Those who run from their suffering and employ an activity to avoid it, need only make a small refinement, they need to engage in an activity that prepares them to be with their suffering, not to temporarily drown out their suffering, which doesn’t work, because when we drown out our suffering, we cannot clearly know that we are suffering; and not knowing that we are suffering, we cannot be there for ourselves when we are suffering, or cultivate compassion for ourselves, which we need to do, if we are intent on overcoming our suffering, so we can suffer less painfully.

The Buddha suffered, Thay suffered, you may suffer, because we all suffer, but Buddha and Thay made that crucial first step of being present with their suffering — to know they were suffering, when suffering — and they lived a much happier and enlightened life as a consequence.

A life of less suffering is possible for all beings, all we need is the way, and the intention to walk the path to freedom.

M